H-M PRIVY Article

Defending Sovereign, Church, and Country from the Forces of Darkness

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The Women of Her Majesty's Government
Sir Differel Van Helsing
by Alicia Keyes Hammond; portrait by Lon Ryden
H-M PRIVY PC Gazette, May 2011

Sir Differel Isolde Churchill Pendragon Van Helsing Plunkett, 16th Baronetess of Denver, Baroness Denver, Viscountess Dunwich, GC, LG, GIM, turns thirty-five this month, and we thought it fitting that she should be honoured as our Lady of May. As Director of the Caerleon Order of the Companions of St. George, she is charged with the protection of Sovereign, Church, and Country from paranormal threats. And never has a guardian angel looked so good.

[Click on the image to see a larger view.]

Sir Differel, as she prefers to be addressed, is the scion of two prestigious families. Her father, Sir Henry Arthur Richard Van Helsing, 15th Baronet of Denver, was the descendent of Abraham Van Helsing, the conqueror of Dracula, while her mother, Gwendolyn Isolde Pendragon Lady Van Helsing, was the latest in a direct line by matrilineal descent from the legendary King Arthur Pendragon. In turn she joined another prestigious family when she married Victor Edward Plunkett, 26th Viscount Dunwich. The issue of that liaison is Henry Abraham Vlad Helsing-Plunkett, 27th Viscount Dunwich, her only child to date.

An orphan and a widow, she has endured great tragedy, but has also gained great reward. She inherited the Baronetcy and became Director at the age of twelve, and was given permission to title herself as "Sir". Nine years later she became the Hero of Britain when she defeated the invasion of Grendel, the Fomorian wizard-king. The following year she was awarded the George Cross and a Life Peerage, and made a member of The Most Noble Order of the Garter. Rumor has it that, upon the death or retirement of Sir Edward Wallace Penbryn, she will be named his successor to the Privy Council as Advisor on Paranormal Affairs. There is also talk that the Queen is considering her for an hereditary peerage.

She is an expert fencer, pistol marksman, and knife-fighter, and is recognized as a virtuoso with the great sword and rapier. For exercise she swims and engages in gymnastics and martial arts. She plays the organ and cello, enjoys horseback riding, and plays pool, chess, and whist. She is a member of the Conservative Party and a teetotaler, but she smokes cigarillos, eats cherry amaretto ice cream, hates dresses with a grand passion, and swears like a sailor when angry. For relaxation, she draws, performs dramatic recitations, and takes field trips with her son. She has no interest in remarrying. Sorry guys.

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We Hold the Line, and This Line Shall Not Be Crossed!